Japanese Men: What You Need to Know About Dating a Japanese Guy

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Rumor has it that dating a Japanese man is a unique and fun experience you can’t compare to anything else – regardless of how long you’ve been in the dating game.

Don’t be alarmed, though: I took one for the team and researched all there is to know about dating Japanese men, the cultural differences, and whether the cultural barriers are too significant for a foreign woman to overcome.

I spent hours and hours online researching and getting to know Japanese guys from afar. To make sure I wasn’t making conclusions based on my personal preference and impressions, I reached out to women who dated Japanese men, talked with a couple of interracial married couples, and got all the relevant info I needed to write this article.

If you’re one of the many women interested in a romance with Japanese men, stick with me as I walk you through:

  • What are Japanese men like
  • How to meet a man from Japan
  • Pros and cons of dating a Japanese man
  • What do Japanese men like in a woman
  • How to tell if a Japanese man likes you

In case you were skeptical about dating Japanese men, there’s a good chance you’ll change your mind!

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What are Japanese men like?

Japanese people, in general, have a different culture compared to Western cultures. You should be aware, though, that times change. While the old Japanese generation may be more traditional, the younger generations embrace modern life, dating, and relationships.

What are 21st-century Japanese men like? Let’s see!

What do Japanese men look like?

what do japanese men like in a woman

Each one of us is unique, but people from the same country seem to have some common appearance traits that are so obvious.

The first thing you’ll notice about men from Japan is that they are all pretty much at the same height – 5′ 7.4″ (171.2 cm).

It’s almost impossible to find blonde Japanese women; the same goes for men. While Japanese women dye their hair, guys from Japan seem to enjoy the uniformity – straight black hair, cheekbones to die for, and those dreamy, seductive cat eyes are the most common features for any male from Japan.

I noticed they are extremely free about how they dress. In Japan, men like to have fun with their style and are not afraid to break a few fashion rules that the fashion police in another country might arrest them for.

Be aware, though: when you join the dating scene, try not to put that much importance on how a person looks. Sure, looks are important but not a key factor when choosing who you’re going to date.

It’s what’s underneath that counts.

Japanese Men: What You Need to Know About Dating a Japanese Guy 1


The personality of Japanese men

It is a cultural stereotype that Japanese men are known to be shy but 100% invested in their work, family, children, and marriage.

They aren’t big on casual relationships and having sex with as many girls as possible, like men from many other countries. Instead, Japanese guys tend to make their parents proud, bond with that one special girl, and get married – which doesn’t mean they aren’t fans of sex before marriage.

Although research shows that Japanese people have less sex than any other culture (for example, 45 times a year), they are still real people with a sex drive, just like any other person.

Honesty comes first for Japanese guys – isn’t honesty what makes relationships last? You can expect your Japanese guy to be very upfront with you. However, men from Japan seem to be ‘afraid’ to talk about their feelings. Come to think of it, is there a man that doesn’t have communication issues?

No matter which culture a man is from – they’re all the same regarding loyalty. Guys will be guys, so keep an eye out for red flags as you would with men from any other country.

Being hard workers, you can expect your man from Japan to have a significant amount of money on him. Although money should never be the deal maker or breaker, it’s nice to know he takes his finances seriously.

All in all, Japanese men and women seem to live in a world quite different from what you might be used to, so you should expect some personality and cultural differences. It’s up to you to decide if you’re fine with their world and whether dating Japanese men is your cup of tea.

Where to meet Japanese men

You can begin your romance with a man from Japan online or offline.

Japanese women prefer in-person dating since they speak Japanese, but if you’re worried about the language barrier, give online dating a chance before going out to meet a Japanese guy.

Being single in Japan is like a fairytale – there are hundreds of things to do. You won’t be single for long when in Japan – from standing bars to restaurants and nightclubs, the opportunities to meet a guy are virtually endless.

Find a Date in Tokyo

If you’re in Tokyo, call your friends, and you can hit these bars and nightclubs:

There are hundreds of shopping malls in Tokyo, so why not make them your dating playground!? These malls are always buzzing:

Find a Date in Osaka

If you’re lonely in Osaka and you need a date to spend some time with, consider looking at these places:

  • Club Piccadilly
  • Burlesque
  • Giraffe
  • The Drunken Clam
  • Club Circus
  • Ghost Ultra Lounge
  • Sam & Dave One
  • OWL
  • Ammona
  • Cheval
  • Club Joule
  • Club Life
  • Club Pure
  • Blarney Stone Shinsaibashi
  • HK ClubQ
  • PC & Retro Bar Space Station

Find a Date in Kyoto

Japan has a vivid nightlife, and there are more and more stories each day about women finding love in Kyoto. These are the places to spend some time if you want to find a date when in Kyoto:

  • Kitsune Kyoto
  • Barcode
  • Butterfly
  • World
  • Metro
  • Hello Dolly
  • Maharaja
  • West Harlem
  • Lounge Infinity
  • Brown Sugar
  • Bar Cordon Noir
  • Rocking Bar ING
  • Pig & Whistle
  • Ki Bar

Online Dating in Japan

Girls, I have good news! Did you know that there are dating websites where women can meet and date men, specifically from Japan!?

eharmony – The Best Dating Site in Japan

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Desire a tranquil evening under Japan’s cherry blossom trees with a charismatic Japanese man? Seek no further than eHarmony, your digital matchmaker for forging a significant, enduring bond.

eHarmony isn’t just your run-of-the-mill dating site – it’s a love revolution! Casual dating is brushed aside, targeting individuals like us, yearning for profound connections. It’s a convergence point for diverse faiths and cultures, particularly enticing a multitude of Christian singles, due to its sincere approach towards love.

Its enchantment is nestled in its Compatibility Matching System – a singular blend concocted from an exhaustive questionnaire. Imagine this: responding to a sequence of inquiries, portraying a genuine reflection of your personality, and presto! eHarmony introduces you to a selection of Japanese charmers who align with your passions, your principles. They even assist with the initial jittery “konichiwa” to your match.

What’s the snag? Simply put, eHarmony wants us to demonstrate dedication. Only half-completed profiles can send or respond to messages – an engaging method to assure only serious seekers.

Their three-tiered membership – Premium Light, Plus, and Extra, spanning from $39.90 to $69.90 per month, may feel a bit pricey. But with regular sales and markdowns, it’s a worthy commitment to love.

Granted, there’s some fine print – a stringent refund policy, and profiles without pictures. But they have a committed security squad rooting out impersonators, confirming your Samurai in Shining Armor is genuine. So, are you set to discover your Japanese love?


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JapanCupid is a fun website my friends told me about. Never in my life did I expect to meet a guy from Tokyo who was my age and shared the same interests, but JapanCupid worked its magic, and I went on the best date of my life! Although our romance didn’t bloom, we ended up being close friends – and now I can visit Tokyo whenever I want!

You can also join JapanCupid and look for your soulmate. The best part is that messages and profiles can be translated into your native language, so you needn’t worry about not knowing what – more precisely, how – to talk to your guy.


asian dating japan men

AsianDating.com is a very popular Asian dating site. You can find Asian singles to date, like Filipino men or other Asian men.

Although there are mostly Asian women registered on the website, you can filter your search and look for men from Japan to have some fun with and get to know them.

While you can’t expect every man on the website to be serious about marriage, many guys are looking for a relationship, a girl they can introduce to their parents and eventually marry. If you’re looking for the same, don’t give up after the first try – finding the right date is not a part-time job!

If all else fails, you can try good old Tinder or Dating.com. There are a lot of members from Japan on these apps, but you get to narrow down your search by selecting your preferred age or location, for example, Tokyo.

Remember that Tinder might not be your best bet if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, someone to get married to and start a family. But, if you’re all about casual dating and would prefer to date someone you can later be friends with, Tinder is the way to go!

Pros and Cons of Dating a Japanese Man

japanese guy

Pros of Dating a Japanese Guy

Let me start by saying that taking a language course can be expensive. Trust me; I’ve been there. Dating a guy from Japan may be just what you need. You get to learn the language and their culture for free – it’s a win-win! 

Ask anyone, and they’ll tell you how social men from Japan are —which means you’ll never have to go out alone (or drink alone).

 Another thing you’ll love about them is that they take very good care of themselves and how they look. If things go well on the first date and you get serious, you needn’t worry about having to shop for him.

 They are also famous for their punctuality. In work settings, you can also count on them to give it their all!   

Japanese cuisine is touted to be one of the world’s best. It is a bonus if your man can cook because you can enjoy all these amazing Japanese dishes from the comfort of your home.

Cons of Dating Japanese Men

Men from Japan are conservative and traditionally more reserved and shy, especially when talking about their feelings and PDA. 

They also prefer women who can cook, which might be an issue in your relationship if you cannot cook. On the bright side, you can always sign up for a cooking course if you’re open to cooking for your guy.

I don’t like that many men from Japan have unconventional opinions on how you are supposed to look and dress. They tend to be quite traditional regarding female gender roles, too.

As true workaholics to the core, it’s not unusual for them to sacrifice their time and work instead. You might also be bothered that he won’t insist on introducing you to his friends. But remember, it’s not you, it’s him – there’s nothing wrong with you; he just doesn’t see the need.

 What Do Japanese Men Like In a Woman?

No one likes someone who is ill-mannered or rude. Hence, they prefer well-behaved women with good personal hygiene habits.

Dressing appropriately will also score you some extra points with him. You don’t have to wear Japanese garb, but you must at least look feminine.  

Indeed, the way to a Japanese man’s heart is through his stomach. They like women who know their way around the kitchen. Plan a dine-in date and spend some time in the kitchen cooking together – you don’t have to prepare a five-course meal, but you have to show some effort.

Communicating with your Japanese partner in his native tongue shows him that you care enough to learn his language, even if it’s just the basics.

How To Tell If a Japanese Man Likes You

If he likes you, you’ll know it!

He will share everything with you, both good and bad, and he’d be eager to hear how your day went.

Even if you’re not Martha Stewart in the kitchen, he will love and eat whatever you cook – whether edible or not. At least he’ll make an effort to chew.

You can tell he wants your relationship to succeed if he’s invested in planning your dates. A night out for some nice conveyor belt sushi, a morning walk in the park, or just a casual brunch – if he’s trying to keep things going, you’re already under his skin!

As women. we have a sixth sense when it comes to relationships. As I said, if he likes you, you’ll know it – don’t bother looking for the signs too much.

Final Thoughts on Japanese Guys

In the past, few women were willing to date men from Japan due to the strictly defined gender roles in Japan’s culture. But, I’ve heard stories that things have changed for the better! More and more women nowadays consider looking for a serious relationship within the Japanese society, so the future looks bright!

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