No dear – it isn’t a fulltime job
Online dating, like any other internet activity, can become addictive. It is thus very important that you learn to set limits for yourself and when to take a step back. For internet romance to work out for you, you need to be in the right headspace. Headspace is vital because it is the only way you can make sober decisions that will work for you.
Sometimes this means acknowledging that online dating burnout is real. It is completely normal, so there is no need for you and your type A personality to be so hard on yourself.
In this guide, we will discuss the key signs that you are ready for a break from swiping and liking. That way you don’t have to keep running like a zombie on autopilot in one of the most important journeys of your life.
Here’s how to know it’s time to give online dating a break.
Raccoon eyes and sore thumbs
That is what happens with people who spend way too much time on these online dating sites. If you get to a point where you are losing sleep, then something is not ok. It means you are working hard and not smart to find love and this usually doesn’t end well.
It feels like a chore or job
Do you groan and die a little inside every time you log onto your online dating account? Have you lost that glee and wonder you once had for getting to see who liked you and who you matched with? If it is yes for both, then you should consider a break.
Zero focus on your offline life
You have become a total slave to your online profile. All you do, think, talk about and feel is in one way or another directly liked to your account. It could be anything from neglecting work obligations to turning down romantic setups from your friends. Online dating platforms should work for you; not the other way round.
You’ve turned into online Nancy Drew
A little sleuthing now and then with online dating is completely harmless and acceptable. After all, if you don’t double check facts to protect yourself who will; am I right? However, there is a fine line between confirming information and being a full-on stalker. If you cross this line because of online dating, you might want to take a step back and rethink your choices.
Loss of faith in the process
After months or even years of having an online dating profile but no real success, cynicism is inevitable. You start to think that there is something wrong either with you or with the system. In such cases, the best thing to do is to take a proper break and try again later.
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You’re taking things a little too personally
All of a sudden it seems like everything that happens to you online is personal. If a text message isn’t replied to right away, you get mad. If you don’t get a match with someone, you liked it stings a little too much.
While it is important to wear your heart on your sleeve, there has to be some degree of detachment for online dating to work. That ensures that you do not go catching feelings for anything with a pulse that says hi to you. So when you start getting too caught up, you should consider stepping back.
Doing it for anyone other than yourself
Why exactly are you signed up and active online? Is it to get your friends who keep hooking you up off your back? Is it because you started a correspondence with someone online and you feel you owe it to them to keep talking? If the answer is anything other than “for me” then you have no business being online.
Overwhelmed by options
Being overwhelmed in online dating usually means that you haven’t taken the time to figure out exactly what it is that you are looking for. With so many options online you will have a really hard time settling. So take some time off and get your ducks in a row. Then once you have your priorities and preferences all figured out, you can give it another shot.
Don’t quit – take a breather
If you experience even one of these signs, then you are long overdue for a break. Fortunately, most dating sites allow you to suspend your account until you are ready to come back. You may even choose to delete it and start fresh when you are ready. Whatever you decide, remember to make yourself the number one priority.